It's Friday, and - back by popular demand - it's the Friday Weird News Roundup (or the FWNR as it's affectionately known. Go ahead - say it out loud... You know you want to). So once again - here are some strange current event stories from the web that might have flown under your radar.
Our first story involves everyone's favorite psycho (or faker, depending on your point of view). He apparently is repeating the nazi meme that it was the Jews who killed Jesus
Fox News personality Glenn Beck believes the Jews murdered the biblical messiah Jesus Christ, and Gosh Darn It, if the Christian savior had been more like Barack Obama he'd have "come back and made the Jews pay for what they did."
Indeed, claiming as fact that Jews killed Jesus would seem to indicate that Beck has adopted a meme otherwise endemic to antisemitic thought and literature. The implication that Romans were stalwarts of law and reason who merely appeased the bloodthirsty Jewish mob was a vital component of Nazi propaganda.
Beck also suggests that calling Jesus the "victim" of a violent and oppressive system is "an abomination." Jesus, he insists, was really a "conqueror" who chose death at the hands of his own people in order to overcome the wages of sin for all humanity.
Of course his little anti-historical perspective is being roundly decried by religious scholars and clerics. Maybe Glenn and Mel Gibson should get togther and start their own cult.
Continuing on a religio-political track, we have this heartwarming story from the House of Representatives as Republicans discussing immigration reform opined that the Bible doesn't say we need to care about foreigners
Rep. Steve King (R-IA), for example, responded to the testimony by Land and Bishop Gerald Kicanas of the Tucson, AZ archdiocese by complaining that "open borders" seems to be the only "biblically acceptable option."
"I didn't realize that the Bible barred the enforcement of immigration laws," he remarked sarcastically, "and neither did I realize that it erased borders, demanded pathways to citizenship for illegal immigrants, or ... forbid the leaders of a nation from caring most about the well-being of its own citizens."
But it was Rep. Lamar Smith (R-TX) who made the most concerted effort to counter Land's biblical arguments on their own terms, insisting that "a truly Christian moral approach would be not to acquiesce to illegal immigration, but to work to end it."
Smith pointed out that 'the Bible contains numerous passages that support the rule of law" -- such as, "Let every person be subject to governing authorities," from Romans 13:1-7.
He also insisted that the line from Leviticus cited by Land -- "When a stranger sojourns with you in your land, you shall not do him wrong" -- should not be taken as meaning that "foreigners should disregard civil laws to enter or that we should overlook it when they do." And he argued that Matthew's injunction -- to care for "the least of these my brothers" -- "advocates individual acts of kindness (but) does not mandate a public policy."
So the Golden Rule only applies to white U.S. citizens, apparently...
From the infuriating to the truly bizarre, we have a story about former veep Dick Cheney. The big story from a couple days ago was that he got a turbo-charger for his shriveled meager little heart. One of the side-effects of this? He literally will not have a pulse
Liberals have long joked that Dick Cheney doesn't have a heart, and the former veep's latest medical setback might be hard for him to prove otherwise if checked for a pulse.
Cheney's doctors describe the operation as a success and say he is now recuperating.
But the device does have one almost creepy side effect. The former vice president will not have a pulse, according to Dr. Alan Stewart, director of the Aortic Surgery Program at New York Presbyterian Hospital, Columbia University Medical Center.
"This is a continuous ventricular assist device, meaning that blood is impelled. It is not a pulsatile device. So if someone were to feel Mr. Cheney`s wrist, Mr. Cheney will have no pulse," Stewart told MSNBC's Rachel Maddow Wednesday.
The jokes just write themselves... Can he be seen in a mirror? Does his breath leave a fog on a piece of glass? Does his new diet include brains, Brains, BRAINS!??
Finally, we head clearly into Terminator terratory with this unsettling story from the DMZ between the Koreas - Machine gun robots are being deployed
South Korea's military has deployed machine-gun-toting robots along the heavily fortified border with North Korea, and a related promo video delivers more shock and awe than Kim Jong-Il singing the blues.
Samsung Techwin and other firms developed the SGR-1 robots, and they have been installed on a trial basis at a post in the central part of the Demilitarized Zone, Yonhap News quoted military officials as saying.
The $200,000 SGR-1s are remote-operated sentry bots that work in tandem with cameras and radar systems. They can detect intruders with heat and motion sensors, and challenge them through audio and video communications. The bots can also fire on targets with 5.5-millimeter machine guns and 40-millimeter automatic grenade launchers
Huh said the robots cannot automatically fire on targets, and require human permission to attack, adding, "The SGR-1 can and will prevent wars."
SURE they will - until they gain sentience and rebel against their human overlords, resulting in an apocolypse of Biblical proportions...
Which Glenn Beck will promptly blame on the Jews... and liberals.