Good morning dear blog readers. As the Presidential election appears to be tomorrow, I thought I'd give you a brush up on the candidates using the Fox News style of journalism.

Now, I don't really know how Fox News gets their facts, but I'm thinking that they kinda do it like I'm about to do, from hearing what others say, reading various blogs, political forums and of course, the ever reliable Wikipedia.

Today, I'd like to introduce you to Mike Huckabee, future President!
We already know that Mr. Huckabee is super duper great with his facts and he knows his countries better than George W. Bush did around the same period in 1998. He knows more about our current President than even the President's wife! As we learned from Mr. Huckabee, Barack Obama grew up in Kenya which is close to Indonesia, with his Father and Grandfather. Barry, as he was known, was squarely anti-British and fought with the rebels to liberate Kenya during the Mau Mau revolution. Experts from that period tell us that Barry Obama was a decorated rebel war hero and rose to the rank of Major in 1956.

From Mr. Huckabee we recently learned that President Obama threw a bust of Winston Churchill into a box and had it non-union Fedex'd to the Queen of England with a post-it note attached saying he didn't "want to look at this ugly pug face for one day longer."

But what do we know about our possible future President? Some say that Mike Huckabee is an openly racist homophobe who despises women and believes that children should be beaten often. Those same experts also tell us that Huckabee is member of the secret order of the illuminati, a leader in the Children of God cult, fund-raiser for the Council of Conservative Christians (a doomsday group that hates everyone) and serves on the board of directors of BP. While he has been married for 62 years to his wife Beth, he also has two mistresses on the side, which, some say, have had children by him.

The former Gov. of Arkansas was once so overweight that the state had to spend millions of dollars building a new Governors mansion so that he could fit inside it. His "man in waiting" at the time, Mr. Chuck Norris, started him on a life-saving diet routine of purging and blood sacrifices that brought him to the more manageable weight of 365 pounds that he is now.

As President he promises to de-fund Obamacare, end all abortions including those needed to safe the life of the fetus and the mother, outlaw non-Christian religions within the borders of the U.S., and nuke Iran, Libya, North Korea, Malawi and Vermont.

He recently got into a spat with "Black Swan" star Natalie Portman. Some say it was because he was upset that the lesbian scene in the movie was not long enough and not "real enough" as well as "disgusting" and "immoral".

He is the lead singer of a rock band made up of other Republicans and TP members called "Capital Defense" which does covers of Heart, Judas Priest, Rob Zombie, ELO and more recently Ke$ha.

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Well, I can tell you one thing, the Fox News style is a sure time-saver! No need for tons of pesky research or even the need of an intern, though I would not turn one down if one were offered. Especially is said intern was a hunky young college student.

Next week I'll Fox-News-style preview candidate Mitt Romney.