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JEB! Can't Quit.
Author: velveeta jones    Date: 02/21/2016 16:07:04

Why the hell is JEB! being allowed to quit his campaign when it's still on life support? We need congress to step in a call a special emergency session to prevent him from pulling the plug.

Sure, he had his down times. He had to have his Mommy and Big Bro come out to hold his hand, but he still had that Bush name and all those great accomplishments to stand on. Why would he quit?

Well he did have some sad times. Like the time that he ran over and hugged a random undecided voter who said he might vote for him. Or the time we all realized that going to www(dot)JebBush(dot)com redirected you to Donald Trumps website because the Bush Machine wasn't savvy enough to secure the web domain back in oh..... 2009 or so.

Not for lack of family name or money, Jeb spent an estimated $2800 per vote in Iowa. His closest competitor in that spending was, shockingly, Mick Huckabee who spent around $700 per voter. Maybe money doesn't mean winning? No, that goes against everything that America stands for!

Speaking of money, JEB! even tried changing his stance on Citizens United towards the beginning of his life support hookup. Shortly after Iowa, JEB! had this to say about CU when asked by reporter Dana Bash:

If I could do it all again I'd eliminate the Supreme Court ruling.This is a ridiculous system we have now where you have campaigns that struggle to raise money directly and they can't be held accountable for the spending of the super PAC that's their affiliate. It creates a mess. Believe me, I'm living through it right now.


Yes, from the "low energy" debates to the weird "evolving" on one of the GOP's best weapons JEB! could just never get it going. And who could forget the rally that turned into a JEB! brainstorming session with potential voters giving him ideas of how to revive his drowning campaign? Yes, the exclamation point is now just a sad irony.

Bush's emails even reflected his low self-esteem:

http://i.imgur.com/tcvTKJXl.png?1



Here is my sad little tribute to (hopefully) the end of the Bush dynasty in politics.


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