Yeah, despite wishing this were true, Velveeta took a quick coffee shop poll asking women of varying ages and ethnicities if they would have sex with Ted Cruz. In what must be the first time in American political history the poll was unanimous: none of the 56 woman (and two gay men) polled would even consider bedding this guy. Not even for money. A LOT of money. Many wondered if even his wife was faking it.
Ted may secretly wish that he was the next John Edwards, but he most surely is not.
Meanwhile, the wagon wheels continue to fall off the GOP bandwagon. Or perhaps the Caddy: