Recently the Republicans held some sort of soirée called the “Values Voters Conference” at the Hilton Hotel in Washington DC which is most remembered for being the site that John Hinckley attempted to get Jodie Foster to notice him. In attendance were the haut monde of the Republican Party. Those that hold their values high and their "holier than thou" sword above the bed of their wives and mistresses; their moral compass never wavers from the direction of the righteousness.

Or does it?

There are some Republicans who I like to call: Republocrites.

Republocrites are those in the GOP who admonish us “little people” that we must always take the moral high ground, while they have been known to wander off the path and into a bank or a whorehouse or, if God were to bless them, a multinational financial center with a whorehouse and a casino attached!

Here are just a few cases in point of those that attended the Conference begging for those Christian votes.

Tim Pawlenty the Governor of blue state Minnesota, has fined tuned the art of being a Republocrite. After all, he is in the running as a 2012 Presidential contender. Like everyone else in his party, he loathes spending Federal dollars on trivial things like Healthcare (naturally) and called emergency Federal funding to states as part of the stimulus package "a meandering spending buffet." He recently remarked on CNN’s State of the Union:



Despite that, not only did he ultimately accept the money, he very recently asked for more Federal money for such socialist concepts as helping out farmers in his state due to losses because of the abnormally wet weather this season. Imagine that! Helping farmers with our tax dollars, just because of a little rain. If that’s not commie socialism, as well as hypocrisy, I don’t know what is.

Mitt Romney and his “ode to Ronald Reagan hair” made an appearance of course. He opened his remarks by acknowledging “the fundamental rights of every single person — including the right to life itself.” Again and again we hear of our rights to life, yet the death panels still work night and day in our American prisons. But Romney is no man of Christian values. He is a suit with a nice tan and coifed hair, nothing more. Anyone who can tie a dog to the top of his car and drive on a highway for 10 hours while the dog, allegedly a family pet, wonders what he has done to deserve this torture could give a flying crap about virtue, goodness, or the feelings of other helpless beings.

Bill Bennett also said a few words at the Values Conference. Bill Bennett knows a thing or two about morality, after all, he wrote a book about it. A freaking BIG book with a catchy name: “The Book of Virtues”. He probably didn’t have time to think up a better name 'cause he was busy gambling. I couldn’t find my copy of “The Book of Virtues” to see how virtuous gambling is, so I’ll just have to believe that gambling is a sport for those with tons of goodness and integrity. I suppose also, that his comment made in 2005, about the crime rate going down if more African American babies where aborted is also just a bit of his home-spun morality.

Eric Cantor has put the Republocrite label on solidly. Mr. Cantor voted for the bailout packages, that is the ones that were recommended by the Bush administration, but decried the Obama bailouts. Then some evil blogger poked a hole in Cantor's facade of moral superiority when it was revealed that Cantor's wife works for a bank that received $267 million from the first half of the bailout funds. How does he spell integrity? I'm guessing its: $-$-$-$-$-$.

From the blog:



Just like an addict, Cantor couldn't stop himself and has been highly critical of how TARP funds have been spent. In his argument against releasing TARP funds to the Obama Administration, Cantor appeared almost populist in tone, repeatedly railing against greedy financial institutions. Watch the hands though, while he's waving his fists in the air, his wife is behind him grabbing your money.

Look for the signs of Republocritism. Speaking loudly and at every opportunity that a mic is anywhere nearby, and being a staunch opponent of whatever the policy/plan might be - seeing absolutely no benefits or bi-partisanship anywhere.

Is there any way to rid ourselves of these Republocrites? Doctors are frantically working on a cure, but so far educating ourselves and our fellow countrymen is our only hope.