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Author: velveeta jones    Date: 01/29/2017 17:27:01

Oh it's good to be back. Dear readers, what a traumatic experience your Velveeta suffered last week; I was KIDNAPPED! I simply attended the inauguration on Friday - and OH what a glorious day it was, then whilst taking a tour of our nation's capital on Saturday, I was swept up in what can only be described as a mob of angry lesbian baby killers! I was paralyzed with fear and even if I'd wanted to move I was surrounded by a mass of bodies, yelling and screaming and large signs and, and......... it was horrible! I'm sure I passed out several times, only to awake with yet another foul-laden chant drowning out my wails.

I'll recap the events as best that I can.

Friday was, as I've said, a glorious day with our new Commander in Chief taking the oath of office. I was merely one of several MILLION people who turned out in person to witness this historic event while Billions more watched at home. I imagine them sitting in front of their TV's with hankies at the ready to weep for joy as he begins to make America great. Again.

His speech was compared by many to equal John F. Kennedy and FDR perhaps with a bit of Lou Grant thrown in. He spoke elequantly of how he won the election and that the losers would not get in the way of his campaign promises. Telling us that at this moment everything is about to change and that America belongs to us. He reminded us again that he won and that only he could defeat radical Islam, end the carnage of gangs and drugs and put thugs behind bars. He promised us jobs in factories that would come back from Mexico. Sadly, he did not have Hillary Clinton arrested though she was sitting right behind him.

The parade was fantastic! Melania looked so glamorous in in Tiffany blue dress with the high cowl neck to hide a few bruises that she suffered accidentally. The parade route was also packed with well over 2 Million people. The Trumps later danced the night away at the Gala with a really great band that is on the level of fame as U2 or the Rolling Stones, or NWA.

Saturday I awoke to a day of taking in the sites and then the horrible events that occurred. It's very hard to speak about the violence that ensued this day; suffice to say that I endured something life changing and I'm sure that I have PTSD from it. I'm sure I also have ADD, SAD, RLS and STD. I will NEVER be the same. The nightmares. The nightmares......

I need to go lay down. I'll just close my eyes and relive that beautiful and very, very, very huge, inauguration.

1 comments (Latest Comment: 01/29/2017 17:42:24 by AuntAzalea)
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