Civil Liberties for Christmas Author: TriSecDate:12/22/2007 12:16:34
'Twas the night before Christmas and all through the nation Friends of Freedom knew it was a special occasion. Lady Liberty stood taller just off the shore Her torch shining brighter than a few weeks before
But it wasn't the flame turning her cheeks all rosy It was thoughts of Snowe, Feingold and Nancy Pelosi And leaders from every side of the aisle Who would soon bring the Bill of Rights back into style.
The Amendments had all hurried out of their beds - Which was no easy task, they were nearly in shreds - And they rushed to the window on papery feet As a jolly old man flew right over their street.
"Could it be!?" they inquired as the roof shook and trembled And they crept toward the mantle, peaceably assembled, Just as someone emerged from the chimney with flair In a shiny red suit, with a shock of white hair
And a top hat, and pants all in red, white and blue - "Wait a minute," the Amendments exclaimed, "Who are you?" "Don't be frightened my children," he said, "it's no scam. "You can't have forgotten your old Uncle Sam!"
"Holy crap!" said Free Speech. "Stop right there!" yelled Bear Arms And Privacy cried "Who shut off the alarms?!" The Fifth remained silent, but Uncle Sam said "We've been having some trouble, but Freedom's not dead."
The Amendments were cautious. "It's just been so long "We've seen Liberty lost, we've seen so much go wrong. "The President's trying to mangle and warp us, "The Fourth is in tatters, so's Habeas Corpus!"
The old man sat down - he had had quite a ride - But he told them "Don't worry, the Law's on our side, "'Cause the nation's fed up and more people are crying "For Justice and an end to illegal spying,
"And secret abductions by the CIA, "And laws that would take women's choices away, "And Gitmo tribunals and secret detention, "And other intrusions too numerous to mention - "
"Not so fast," said a grinchity voice from above And Don Rumsfeld pushed past the Fourteenth with a shove. He was covered in soot and he looked kind of scary. It seemed like his Christmas had not been so merry.
The Amendments said they weren't happy to see him: "You tried to throw all of us in the museum! "You've done so much the Constitution forbids!" "And I would have gone on, but for you meddling kids!"
Uncle Sam told him "Rummy, your plans just won't do, "So we've got a brand new timetable for you!" And as Rumsfeld retired and crept into the night The Amendments cried out "Have a good secret flight!"
From the distance they heard him reply with a snort. "Bye-bye, Rummy!" they answered, "we'll see you in court!" Uncle Sam rode the chimney up out of the room And, like Frosty, he said "I'll be back again soon."
But they heard him exclaim "Oh, and just one more thing! "This year, when the holiday bells start to ring, "Try to honor religion. Honest faith can't be wrong. "It's America, can't we all just get along?
"So, on Christian," he cried, "Muslim, Hindu, and Jew! "On Quaker! On Shaker! And Atheist too! "On Buddhist! On Taoist! And to show we're not chickens "We'll file a few lawsuits defending the Wiccans!
"Your belief is your right, so get out there and savor it. "Uncle Sam's not a preacher, and he doesn't play favorites!" So this holiday season, whatever you do, Warmest wishes for Freedom, from the ACLU.
Is the Chick-Filet chain anywhere around the ATL? I know it's around Virginia and North Carolina and it's supposed to be run by a right-wing religious nutjob.
Quote by livingonli: Is the Chick-Filet chain anywhere around the ATL? I know it's around Virginia and North Carolina and it's supposed to be run by a right-wing religious nutjob.
It's Chick-fil-A, and they originated and are based in the Atlanta area (I've been inside their corporate headquarters). The founder is Truett Cathy, and while he IS religious, I don't know if I'd put him in the "right-wing nutjob" catagory. He insists that all of the franchises are closed on Sundays (despite the obvious loss of revenue), so he puts his money where his dogma is, and I kind of respect that.
He collects rare and antique cars (they're in the lobby of the corporate headquarters, including a batmobile), so that's kind of cool too.
But most importantly - the food is good.
Comment bylivingonli on 12/22/2007 20:34:28
The commercials are certainly interesting with the cows making signs that say "eat more chikken".
Comment bylivingonli on 12/22/2007 20:51:40
Quote by BobR:
Quote by livingonli: Is the Chick-Filet chain anywhere around the ATL? I know it's around Virginia and North Carolina and it's supposed to be run by a right-wing religious nutjob.
It's Chick-fil-A, and they originated and are based in the Atlanta area (I've been inside their corporate headquarters). The founder is Truett Cathy, and while he IS religious, I don't know if I'd put him in the "right-wing nutjob" catagory. He insists that all of the franchises are closed on Sundays (despite the obvious loss of revenue), so he puts his money where his dogma is, and I kind of respect that.
He collects rare and antique cars (they're in the lobby of the corporate headquarters, including a batmobile), so that's kind of cool too.
But most importantly - the food is good.
I did look at their menu. Certainly healthier than the standard menu at most fast food places.
Comment byBobR on 12/22/2007 23:09:20
Quote by livingonli: The commercials are certainly interesting with the cows making signs that say "eat more chikken".
It's become its own phenomenon. You can buy cow calenders, stuffed plush cows, key chains... The location near us had a "Get your picture taken with Santa Cow" last weekend.
No, we didn't.
Comment byBobR on 12/22/2007 23:12:22
Quote by livingonli:
I did look at their menu. Certainly healthier than the standard menu at most fast food places.
I like that they have real lemonade (not that nasty stuff yellow corn syrup and citric acid stuff most places spew from the soft-drink dispensers). The waffle fries are delish too (they still have the skins on).
Just curious - what made you ask about Chick-fil-A and it's founder?
Comment bylivingonli on 12/22/2007 23:34:01
Quote by BobR:
Quote by livingonli:
I did look at their menu. Certainly healthier than the standard menu at most fast food places.
I like that they have real lemonade (not that nasty stuff yellow corn syrup and citric acid stuff most places spew from the soft-drink dispensers). The waffle fries are delish too (they still have the skins on).
Just curious - what made you ask about Chick-fil-A and it's founder?
At work today, we were running some of the commercials during a college basketball game on FSN Florida (we were riding FSN South's feed) so the commercials were running from my end as well as theirs. A few years ago, when a friend of mine lived in Virginia Beach, he made a few remarks about them being closed on Sundays. When seeing the spots, I thought back to that trip. Then again, he was a big fan of Dairy Queen.
It's amazing how many chains I've noticed that aren't here in the Northeast or at least the New York area. It seems like Denny's is everywhere but New York (but then we have those independently owned diners).
Although I still wonder how the crappy chain Pizza manages to stay in business up here.
Comment byMondobubba on 12/22/2007 23:58:16
eat mor chikkin! why chick-filliat (as it called here in the casa de mondo) is verra tastee.