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Lonely Star State
Author: velveeta jones    Date: 05/10/2009 13:57:46

Velveeta was recently alerted to this alarming trend in Texas. According to Think Progress comes this shocking CNN report that Texas is charging women thousands of dollars for the rape kits they use at the hospital. Essentially, since these rape kits are part of the police investigation, the police are charging these women for cooperating with authorities.

Once again, Texas is leading the way in setting the bar for decency and friendliness of the New South. The rest of us really need to step up to their level of charm and enlightenment, not to mention equality.

:rolleyes2:

You may recall that Texas Gov. Rick Perry recently implied that Texas might need to secede from the United States. Seems the Federal Gov’ment was insisting on giving them stimulus money that comes from (drama sting) TAXES!! Abhorrent! And, to add insult to injury, the Federal US of A want to ever so slightly raise the top marginal tax rates!! Repugnant! Obviously these are the first signs of impending socialism and Texas, being Texas, wants no part in these matters.

Well, for me, this is the last straw. Having women pay for being victimized? I say to Texas: bye-buh, don’t let the swinging Wal-Mart doors hit you on the ass as you exit. And please, feel free to take parts of Oklahoma with you, won’t you?

As well, we’re going to give you a parting gift with our thanks: please accept all our gun toting militia crazies, bomb throwing abortion clinic loonies, and anyone who doesn’t believe in evolution. Also, we’ll throw in any Dallas Cowboy fans that somehow made it past your boundaries.

Also, well give you all the Wal-Marts you want, polygamist cults, people longing for the Rapture and gay bashers.

Secede tonight before midnight and we’ll throw in beer-swilling yahoos that beat their wives and kids, big churches, spoiled rich kids that spend daddy’s money and Chuck Norris.

All we ask for in exchange is the Rangers outfielders, Austin and pundit Jim Hightower.

We, the USA, look forward to negotiating with you in the future and good luck with your border problems.

 

12 comments (Latest Comment: 05/10/2009 22:08:34 by TriSec)
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Comments:

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Comment by AuntAzalea on 05/10/2009 14:09:37
Ooo Oooo can we throw in Michael Vicks the dog hating monster too?

Comment by trojanrabbit on 05/10/2009 14:11:13
Aren't they just taking the lead from their presumptive 2012 savior, Sarah Palin?

Comment by velveeta jones on 05/10/2009 14:17:24
Damn, I forgot big-haired, dumb as rocks, beauty queens.

Comment by BobR on 05/10/2009 15:02:36
Quote by trojanrabbit:

Aren't they just taking the lead from their presumptive 2012 savior, Sarah Palin?


Either she did - or wanted to - institute the same abhorent rape kit policy

Comment by Raine on 05/10/2009 15:52:30
:clap: Buh BYE Texas.



BTW- Today on Face the Nation Darth Cheney said He would pick Rush Limbaugh over Colin Powell for President.



:thud:

Comment by livingonli on 05/10/2009 15:54:55
Greetings from the salt mine.



Pulling in a little OT and of course I have to start off with one of these infomercials on getting rich in real estate touting that it could be done even in a down market. Buy, they try to suck you in. I may need to find some additional work, but it has to be legitimate if I am ever going to get out of my own hole.

Comment by livingonli on 05/10/2009 15:57:11
Quote by BobR:

Quote by trojanrabbit:

Aren't they just taking the lead from their presumptive 2012 savior, Sarah Palin?


Either she did - or wanted to - institute the same abhorent rape kit policy


That was in the news about women in Alaska and in Wasilla when she was mayor having to pay for the rape kits.

Comment by BobR on 05/10/2009 16:45:45
Quote by livingonli:

Greetings from the salt mine.



Pulling in a little OT and of course I have to start off with one of these infomercials on getting rich in real estate touting that it could be done even in a down market. Buy, they try to suck you in. I may need to find some additional work, but it has to be legitimate if I am ever going to get out of my own hole.


hey - apparently you can make money in real estate, right? :rolleyes:



Comment by livingonli on 05/10/2009 17:21:42
Quote by BobR:

Quote by livingonli:

Greetings from the salt mine.



Pulling in a little OT and of course I have to start off with one of these infomercials on getting rich in real estate touting that it could be done even in a down market. Buy, they try to suck you in. I may need to find some additional work, but it has to be legitimate if I am ever going to get out of my own hole.


hey - apparently you can make money in real estate, right? :rolleyes:



Well, that's what he says.

Comment by Random on 05/10/2009 18:00:56
Random just got back from seeing the new Star Trek movie. Which was awesome, if you ignore that fact that Chekov, Sulu, and Bones get no character development, and Uhura and Scotty get very little.(of course not like Uhura got any character development in the series)

And of course you can get past that it's basically a re launch of the series, which thankfully is explained, rationally, BUT, makes the last 40 years of star trek (except enterprise) a waste of your time. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Comment by trojanrabbit on 05/10/2009 19:28:33
So much for sitting outside today. It's so windy the laptop screen is shaking. Leaving to see Star Trek in a few hours anyway.

Comment by TriSec on 05/10/2009 22:08:34
First Communion today. Javi is one with the eucharist.



Which means we spent the entire afternoon skipping from restaraunt to backyard to who knows where else; I've been drinking since noon. (roughly one drink per hour all day.)



Woohooooo!



(Actually, I'm done. It wouldn't do to show up my first day tomorrow with a hangover.)